Memoirs of the Returnee
Memoirs of the Returnee - Chapter 276: What are Emotions(2)

On a dark night, Yu Hains returned to his own hospital, Spring Water Hospital, lost deep in thought. He let out a faint sigh as he gazed at the clusters of stars filling the night sky outside the window.

Yu Hains, an associate physician at Libra Medical Center and the director of Spring Water Hospital.

At some point, he had come to be recognized as a highly authoritative doctor in the industry, yet all his research was focused on the least profitable area.

Perhaps it was an obsession.

A very personal fixation on the disease that had taken the woman he loved…

Yu Hains silently closed his eyes. Bright memories from the past floated up in the darkened world.

The woman who smiled at him.

The knight who seemed unbreakable, with a sword at her waist and a turtle-like shield on her back.

One day, she fell ill with the same disease as Shion Ascal. However, her prognosis was much worse.

Because she was a knight.

The woman who was stronger than himself, who in his eyes was stronger than anyone in the world, suddenly became the most vulnerable patient.

All he could do as a husband and a doctor was to watch. To hold the hand of his dying wife.

Yu Hains felt a drowning sense of powerlessness as he looked at his wife. Her words of ’I’m sorry’ tore at his heart with pain.

…Diseases take away so much.

The time left to live, the days walked together, memories, and eventually, even the emotion called love.

His terminally ill wife apologized for her death even in her final moments.

Yu Hains found that heartbreaking.

—I like her a lot.

The voice of Shion Ascal talking about Johanna came to mind.

Perhaps, he felt the same way.

Yu Hains couldn’t know how much Shion liked Johanna. But surely, he thought of that emotion as a ‘burden.’

Just as his wife did.

Cancer of the Magic’s Core is a disease that occurs in mana. It’s a vicious curse where the mana housed in the body itself becomes corrupt.

Shion Ascal is holding on thanks to his inability to complete his Magic Body, but his lifespan is unlikely to exceed ten years.

Yu Hains opened a drawer in the hospital. He took out a carefully placed frame.

A photo of himself in a gown and her in armor, both smiling brightly at the camera.

The picture taken on the first day they achieved their dream together.

“…I miss you.”

Yu Hains murmured in a trembling voice as he hugged the photo.

“So very much…”

He quietly fell asleep.

…

At the same time, Johanna was reading a file about Professor Yu Hains.

He was born an orphan, but became a doctor, and though he took a knight as his partner, she died of cancer.

It was a cruel fate.

A knight, the wife of a doctor, dying of an illness.

“Cancer of the Magic’s Core, huh…”

It was an exceedingly rare disease.

Crunch, crunch—Balancer Vitro spoke as he peeled an apple.

“lt’s almost harmless to ordinary people who don’t use magic at all, but for those who can use magic or knights and mages who have completed the Magic Body, it’s the worst disease with a 99% mortality rate.”

A 99% mortality rate within five years. And among them, only three, who were all ordinary people.

“How strange.”

“Yes. However, the incidence rate is also very low, so it’s not something to worry about. It’s said to be as rare as being struck by lightning while walking down the street…”

Suddenly, Vitro put a hand to his ear.

He had received some report.

“My lord. There are no records related to Miss Zia at Spring Water Hospital, where Professor Yu Hains serves as di rector.”

“IS that so.”

Well, given Zia’s personality, she wouldn’t have left any charts behind.

It was expected.

“Leave that doctor alone for now. We’ll find out in due course.”

“Yes.”

Johanna picked up a piece of the apple Vitro had peeled and ate it with her fingers, chewing as she thought about Shion Ascal.

What could that guy be doing right now?

She was curious.

…Why?

Johanna furrowed her brow without realizing it.

Why was she curious?

Why with was she wondering what he was doing right now?

her arms crossed, Johanna pondered the reason.

Of course, that guy had saved her life. He had completed any mission perfectly and had anticipated Beckman’s betrayal, preventing a disaster.

At the same time, he liked her, so there was no risk of betrayal.

He was that valuable.

A precious talent.

That’s why she wants him…

She wants to possess him.

Yes, like owning a treasure or a trophy.

She just want to 'have' Shion Ascal…

—David, the external team leader of the Libra Intelligence Agency, was thirsty for information. Specifically, he desired a 'safety net’ that included reconnaissance and scouting.

The external team, as the name suggests, encompasses Chasers who operate in the field.

It’s not just about simple espionage or infiltration, but a profession that involves direct combat.

Therefore, for them, information was a matter of survival.

External team leader David was more aware of the importance of reconnaissance than anyone and had requested the corresponding budget from Director Gedley, but Gedley had always refused, citing trivial reasons.

“There's an ambush at the coordinates provided. It seems to be a trap for sure.”

I satisfied David’s desire.

I utilized Grawl’s feline connections for reconnaissance.

—Confirmed. Will relay the message. Will contact you again later.

Requests for scouting came in four or five times a day, but given enough time, Grawl completed them without any trouble.

[C1090. Mission completed.]

[K305. Mission completed.]

[JJJOM3. Mission completed.]

Moreover, members of the 'Bell Moore team’, including Chloe, Sia, Jeff, consistently embarked on missions.

They would accumulate achievements day by day, and I would provide the appropriate financial reward—an incentive.

“Would 200,000 be enough?”

In truth, the incentive is at the discretion of the team leader.

Of course, Bell Moore wouldn’t think of giving out incentives, but I could just burn my own money.

I had more than enough ’Libra Points’ I received from Derek before.

“……I should make a show of it.”

I activated the hotline.

[The team has completed 8 missions over the past month.]

[I will distribute Libra Points at my discretion.]

I divided a total of 200,000 points equally among the three of them.

With that, I had more or less finished the day’s work, and it was 6 PM.

“About now.”

The meeting would have ended.

I got up from my seat to go and confront Bell Moore.

……

“Not a bad ope rati on.”

In the executive meeting room, Gedley looked at Bell Moore's short-selling report with a complex expression.

“Ha ha. Do you think so?”

Bell Moore smiled. Gedley found that smile quite nauseating.

But there was nothing he could do.

It was a very intellectual and sharp, needle-like operation. Especially for Gedley, who came from the economic sector.

He hadn’t expected such a loophole in Vern’s new enterprise, New Frontier.

“IS this your idea?”

“Yes, it is.”

Bell Moore suppressed his expression for the moment. The atmosphere around him was quite serious.

The other team leaders were sending envious glances his way.

“……WelL It’s not bad. Not bad, but.”

Gedley slowly turned his words around.

“Such large-scale short selling requires operational experience, as well as personnel. The situation changes every minute, every second, making it difficult to carry out decisively at the Intelligence Agency level.”

Then he tapped the report with his hand.

“lt’s not bad, but it's a plan that will soon turn bad.”

“Hmm… Is that so?”

Bell Moore felt self-conscious. Gedley gestured to him with his eyes.

“How about this? Let’s leave it to the station. They know much more about the economy than we do”

“Ah. Yes.”

Bell Moore immediately granted permission.

“ITI do that.”

His principle was to avoid causing disputes or even attracting jealousy if possible. After all, as long as his idea was recognized, that was enough for him.

“……Well then. I’ll report this matter to Lord Derek myself.”

Gedley said as he put the report into a drawer.

“Yes.”

“That’s all for today. You may leave.”

The five team leaders, excluding David who was on a mission, exited the director’s conference room. While the other team leaders were accompanied by their respective lines, Bell Moore was alone.

He preferred it that way.

“……What’s this?”

But he wasn't alone.

At the end of the corridor stood Shion Ascal.

“What do you want?”

“The meeting’s over, isn’t it? That’s why I’m here.”

“……What are you talking about? I don't need that kind of thing.

Better if you didn’t come at all. It’s annoying having you around.”

“Why does my presence bother you?”

“You attract too much attention from above. I don’t want that kind of attention.”

Shion tilted his head in confusion.

“For someone who doesn’t want attention, you took my report.”

“……YOU knew?”

“How could I not know? You could have made a copy.”

“……Ahem.”

Bell Moore cleared his throat and waved his hand dismissively.

“Look. The operation’s going to turn sour anyway, so we decided to hand it over to the station.”

“……TO the station?”

Shion’s expression shifted subtly.

“Yeah, man. We can’t handle a large-scale short sale like that. You’ve never done a short sale before, have you? So don’t get too attached. The idea's good, but it’s not something we can execute. Okay?”

“……Well. Yes.”

Shion forced down the smirk tugging at his lips.

He had expected this.

Bell Moore would pass the report to Gedley, and Gedley would entrust it not to the station but to his own team members.

In professional terms, this was known as ’shucking.’

“l’m off then.”

“Going to the club again?”

“No. I’ve got work to do, man.”

Bell Moore waved and left.

Shion chuckled to himself.

For the record, this short sale operation was an event that happened in the future.

The result? A failure.

The extent? Quite disastrous.

“lt’s simple and easy to man ipu late .”

Indeed, Bell Moore needed to be pushed upwards as much as possible.

On a peaceful weekend afternoon at the Libra Medical Center.

Johanna furrowed her brows at the net-like thing that had been placed over her head.

“……What’s this now?”

Yu Hains answered.

“lt’s a machine to measure brain waves.”

“Hah.”

Johanna let out a hollow laugh.

“I know what it is. I’m asking why you’re putting it on me.”

“You said you were feeling tightness in the chest.”

Yu Hains spoke calmly as he sat down in the chair opposite to her. He turned the monitor so Johanna could see it.

“l’m going to measure it to see if it might be a psychological issue.”

“Measuring psychology.”

“Yes. It’s simple. Just watch the video I play and feel your emotions honestly. Is that okay with you?”

“……”

Johanna pressed her lips tightly together, narrowing her eyes as she glared at Yu Hains.

Yu Hains replied nonchalantly.

“lf Lady Johanna has been hospitalized, you must think it’s a rather serious issue, don’t you? As your physician, I intend to do my best to find a solution. I ask for your coo pe ratio n.”

Click—

Yu Hains pressed a button. A video started playing on the monitor. It was a scene of a roughly shaped puppy frolicking in a field.

“……What’s this?”

“Just watch.”

Click—

He pressed another button. This time, it was a child laughing.

Click—

He continued to press the button.

A scene of a man getting hit by a car, a child grinning and calling for his mother, a comical scene of a grandfather trying to remove his dentures and his jaw coming off as well, a dying old gentleman embracing his grandson, and so on…

A succession of ordinary slides that could hardly be called psychological therapy.

“What in the world is this?”

“Lady Johan na.”

Yu Hains interrupted her.

“Lady Johanna has an incredibly rational brain.”

“……”

A rational brain.

It didn’t sound like a bad thing to hear.

Johanna quietly listened to what Yu Hains had to say next.

“Look. This is the change in Lady Johanna’s brain when she views the slides.”

Colorful currents faintly shimmered across the gray brain. They were truly 'faint.' They spread out as if they were going to disperse but stayed right at the edge, lingering there.

“As you can see, Lady Johanna’s brain only feels a very small part of the emotions. It's probably a part you were born with.”

“Hmm… I’ve heard that before.”

It was indeed something she had heard before. She had undergone tests at a hospital before entering university.

Her innate nature was cool, calm, and rational.

Something like that was the diagnosis.

“But. Look at this.”

Yu Hains displayed someone on the slide—someone he anticipated would cause a dramatic change in Johanna.

It was a video of Shion Ascal.

—Hello. I’m Shion Ascal.

“……1”

ln that moment, Johanna was greatly shaken.

—I am a sponsor of Spring Water Hospital… Do I really have to record this?

Shion Ascal looked at the camera with a baffled expression. He showed a clear smile that he had never shown to Johanna before.

Johanna’s heart pounded.

That ’frustration’ she knew all too well surged back with a vengeance.

“Yes. That’s enough.”

Yu Hains, who had just nodded, pointed to the state of Johanna’s brain.

“Look.”

Johanna turned to look as well.

“…What.”

For a moment, her thoughts froze.

Her brain was awash with colors.

Almost every part that had been gray just moments before was now smeared with vibrant hues.

“When someone sees a certain person, hormones and neurotransmitters like dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin are secreted in their brain,” Yu Hains continued.

“The action of these chemicals causes various parts of the brain to become extremely active, and during this process, a person feels certain emotions.”

Facing the bewildered Johanna, Yu Hains concluded.

“The academic world calls this ‘love’.”