The Diary and Letters of Madame D'Arblay
Chapter 77 : Since that time, however, I have come on prodigiously, by constant practice, in the pow

Since that time, however, I have come on prodigiously, by constant practice, in the power and skill of walking backwards, without tripping up my own heels, feeling my head giddy, or treading my train out of the plaits--accidents very frequent among novices in that business; and I have no doubt but that, in the course of a few months, I shall arrive at all possible perfection in the true Court retrograde motion.

In another college, in an old chapter house, I had the opportunity to see another Court-scene. It was nearly round in shape, and had various old images and ornaments. We were all taken in by the doctors attendant, and the party, with doctors and all, nearly filled it; but, finding it crowded, everybody stood upon the less ceremony, and we all made our examinations of the various contents of the room quite at our ease: till suddenly the king and queen, perceiving two very heavy old-fas.h.i.+oned chairs were placed at the head of the room for their reception, graciously accepted them, and sat down. Nothing could exceed the celerity with which all confusion instantly was over, and the most solemn order succeeded to it. Chairs were presented to the three princesses by the side of the queen, and the d.u.c.h.ess of Ancaster and Lady Harcourt planted themselves at their backs; while Lady Charlotte instantly retreated close to the wall, and so did every creature else in the room, all according to their rank or station, and the royal family remained conspicuous and alone, all crowd dispersed, and the s.p.a.ce of almost the whole room unoccupied before them, so close to the walls did every body respectfully stand.

SURPRISED BY THE QUEEN.

The last college we visited was Cardinal Wolsey's--an immense fabric.

While roving about a very s.p.a.cious apartment, Mr. Fairly[212] came behind me, and whispered that I might easily slip out into a small parlour, to rest a little while; almost everybody having taken some opportunity to contrive themselves a little sitting but myself. I a.s.sured him, very truly, I was too little tired to make it worth while; but poor Miss Planta was so woefully fatigued that I could not, upon her account, refuse to be of the party. He conducted us into a very neat little parlour, belonging to the master of the college, and Miss Planta flung herself on a chair, half dead with weariness.

Mr. Fairly was glad of the opportunity to sit for a moment also; for 'my part, I was quite alert. Alas! my dear Susan, 'tis my mind that is so weak, and so open to disorder;--my body, I really find, when it is an independent person, very strong, and capable of much exertion without suffering from it.

Mr. Fairly now produced, from a paper repository concealed in his coat pocket, some apricots and bread, and insisted upon my eating--but I was not inclined to the repast, and saw he was half famished himself--so was poor Miss Planta: however, he was so persuaded I must both be as hungry and as tired as himself, that I was forced to eat an apricot to appease him.

Presently, while we were in the midst of this regale, the door suddenly opened, and the queen came in!--followed by as many attendants as the room would contain. Up we all started, myself alone not discountenanced; for I really think it quite respect-sufficient never to sit down in the royal presence, without aiming at having it supposed I have stood bolt upright ever since I have been admitted to it. Quick into our pockets was crammed our bread, and close into our hands was squeezed our fruit; by which I discovered that our appet.i.tes were to be supposed annihilated, at the same time that our strength was to be invincible.

Very soon after this we were joined by the king, and in a few minutes we all paraded forth to the carriages, and drove back to Nuneham.

I have been very minute in this Oxford account, because it presented scenes so new to me, and because I concluded that, after you have had a month or two of general journal, you will have nothing more to be new to either of us.

This Oxford expedition was, altogether, highly entertaining to me; but I ought not to close it without telling you the sweetness of all the princesses, who each made a point of speaking to, Miss Planta and to me upon entering or quitting every college, as we stood in the ranks, while they pa.s.sed.

AT NUNEHAM AGAIN.

I stayed in my own room till a message from the Miss Vernons brought me down to dinner; and from this time forward those ladies exerted themselves to the utmost in being attentive, sociable, and civil. I found the major, Mr. Fairly Mr. Hagget, Miss Planta, and themselves; and we had a very pleasant dinner, talking over the sights just seen. All the afternoon was spent in the same party. We went into Lord Harcourt's library to tea and coffee, and there we had short visits from his lords.h.i.+p and the d.u.c.h.ess of Ancaster.

In the evening Lady Harcourt came also, and was amazingly courteous.

The queen then sent for the Miss Vernons into the drawing-room, and Miss Planta and myself left the gentlemen to take care of themselves, and retired for the evening to our own rooms.

You must know, wherever the king and queen are, n.o.body comes into their sight unsent for, not even the master and mistress of the house, unless they are publicly acquainted that their majesties are coming, and mean to see them.

A LIVELY BREAKFAST INCIDENT.

_Monday, Aug. 14._--I come now to introduce to you a new acquaintance.

I did not get down to breakfast till it was almost over, as I was detained with the queen, and as everybody was obliged to make what haste they could, in order to insure a meal before a summons. I found Miss Planta, and the aide-de-camp, vice chamberlain, and equerry; Lady Harcourt had already breakfasted with them, but made off as soon as the queen was visible, to wait upon her majesty. Miss Vernons lay in bed from yesterday's fatigues.

The extreme silence and gravity of the aide-de-camp threw a reserve and constraint on all the party, and we were all nearly dumb, when a new lady suddenly rushed into the room. This was Mrs. Harcourt, the aide-de-camp's wife, who had been ill the preceding day, and therefore had not ventured to Oxford. She is a showy, handsome woman, extremely talkative, with quick parts, high spirits, and a rattling vein of humour.

Miss Planta, who had taken Lady Harcourt's place, in order to pour out the tea, instantly moved to another. Mrs. Harcourt hurried into that just vacated, without ceremony, calling out, "How monstrous late you all are!--though I need not talk, for I hate getting up early. I was so vastly ill yesterday I could not stir, but I am vastly well to-day, so I am going to Blenheim."

This day had been previously dedicated to seeing Blenheim.

"To Blenheim?" repeated General Harcourt, in a low voice.

"Yes, sir, to Blenheim! So no grave faces, for my plan is fixed."

He half articulated a fear of her being ill again, but she stopped him with "O, no matter, leave that to the Fates;--the queen has been so gracious as to say I may go, and therefore go I shall: so say nothing about it, for that's settled and unalterable."

"After being so ill yesterday," said Mr. Fairly, "I think it will be rather too much for you."

"Not at all!--and what's more, you must carry me."

"I am very glad to hear it," cried he, "if go you will."

"Yes, that I will, certainly; and some of you must take me. I have no coach ordered,-and there is not one to spare: so, amongst you, you equerries, you must carry me. I have never been to Blenheim since I married."

"Were you before?" said the general.

"Yes, sir, and you took me."

"Did I?"

"Yes, sir, you had that honour; and I think you have never taken that trouble since."

All this, though uttered in a voice as peremptory as the language, was spoken with very becoming smiles, and an air of saucy good humour.

The breakfast all this while had stood quite still: indeed there was n.o.body but myself that had not nearly done. Major Price handed me roll and b.u.t.ter and bread across the table, by way of hint, I believe; all which I declined: at last Mr. Fairly said,

"Miss Burney, which is your cup?"

Upon this, Mrs. Harcourt, abruptly turning to me, exclaimed "O dear, you've got no tea!" Then pouring out a dish of slop, added, "Can you drink it? It looks very melancholy."

"No," I said, "I have had enough."

Have not you also, my Susan, had enough of this scene?

The Blenheim visit being considered as a private one, n.o.body went but of the Marlborough acquaintance: though in all royal parties, the whole company is always named by the royals, and the lords and ladies of the mansions have no more right to invite a guest than a guest has to come uninvited.

I spent this day very pleasantly, in walking over the grounds which are extremely pretty, seeing a flower-garden planned by Mr. Mason, and the pictures in the house. The two Miss Vernons, Miss Planta, and Mr.

Hagget, were all that remained at Nuneham. And it was now I wholly made peace with those two ladies; especially the eldest, as I found her, the moment she was removed from rays so bright that they had dazzled her, a rational, composed, obliging woman. She took infinite and unwearied pains to make amends for the cold and strange opening of our acquaintance, by the most a.s.siduous endeavours to give me pleasure and amus.e.m.e.nt. And she succeeded very well. I could blame n.o.body but the countess' sister for our reception; I plainly saw these ladies had been unprepared to look upon us as any charge to themselves.

The royal excursioners did not return till between six and seven o'clock, when we dined with the same party as the preceding day. The evening, too, had just the same visitors, and pa.s.sed in just the same manner.

SECT. 9 (1786-7-)