How To Survive as a Villain
-
How To Survive as a Villain - Chapter 3: This Book is Really Toxic.
When Xiao YuAn got his medical examination results, his face darkened for a long time. Then he went back and read 233 Tyrannical Presidential novels, but he wasn’t able to find a single story with a President being diagnosed with a terminal illness.
However, Xiao YuAn didn’t care and instead developed a surprising hobby.
And that was.
Reading novels! Reading! Web! Novels!
He couldn’t find his role in life, and couldn’t cure his disease. So why don’t use the last of his existence to read novels and comfort his soul.
But in the end, when Xiao YuAn wanted to find spiritual comfort from novels, the heavens had to slap him hard in the face again.
Xiao YuAn was reading a novel that was on the top ten of a certain online list.
There are thousands of masterpieces in this world, but Xiao YuAn just had to immerse himself into a novel in which he wanted to bury the author alive after he finished reading it.
This novel was way too toxic and cruel. The author fed the knives to the readers, as if they were flies molesting everyone; they couldn’t be avoided, and they were like those big Spanish flies!
After reading, Xiao YuAn flipped through the comment section of the novel, and as expected, the readers kindly showed the author the lower limit of their cursing skills.
[A perfectly good historical novel got fucking turned into a stallion novel1!!! I’m aaarghhh!!!]
[Author, come out. Aaaaahhh I promise I won’t hit you! I’ll just cut you with a blade!!!]
[The first half of the book was amazing, but then the second half arouses my desires to kill!! This novel is stupid!!!]
In the comment section, the insults were original, but they weren’t fun. There were some who were insulting the characters, and some others who were insulting the plot. True fans vs anti fans, it was truly chaotic. Everything and everyone was being insulted. In the end, most people didn’t even know what they were insulting anymore.
Xiao YuAn saw an interesting long comment, the general content was like this: [As a fan of historical fiction, and as someone who once held this book close to my heart but now sees it as pure dirt, I feel I have something to say…
And I have a lot to say!!!
First, let’s take a closer look at the name of this book: “The History of the Four Kingdoms”.
Listen! You guys listen! What an orthodox name! How elegant! How meticulous! How awe-inspiring!
And this novel starts out very decent too! Let me briefly explain the story for those who haven’t read it.
It tells the story of the Prince of the Southern Yan Kingdom, who was captured and taken prisoner to the Northern Kingdom. The Male Lead, who used to be a Prince, was tortured, humiliated and abused in the Northern Kingdom. But even then, he endured the humiliation and was able to escape from the Northern Kingdom.
However, the country in which he used to live, was already at war. The people suffered and the land was occupied by enemy countries. From then on, the Prince relied on his hatred and in his talent, summoning his subordinates, recruited troops, and defeated the Northern Kingdom in one fell swoop. He even killed the Young Emperor with his own hands. Afterwards, the Prince went further and further on his road of unifying the Four Kingdoms into one.
Friends!! Look! Look at the rise and fall of this Country, look at the mountains and rivers that are breaking down. What an exciting novel this is!
However!!!
Ever since the author finished writing the Male Lead defeating the Northern Kingdom, it seems as if they were high on drugs!! His ego began to let go of the status quo! The Female Generals of the Western Shu Kingdom, the Erotic Prostitutes of the Southern Yan Kingdom, the Twelve Singers of the Eastern Wu Kingdom. The Male Lead was like a walking aphrodisiac, growing his harem while also fighting a war.
Growing! His! Harem! While! Also! Fighting! A! War!
Why haven’t his subordinates killed him yet!!!!!
Wherever he went, the girls would climb onto him without asking for anything in return, it looked like an open invitation. And just like that, he unified the nation, out of thin air!
It’s fine to write it as a stallion novel, even having ten girls a night is fine too. But writing an historical fictional book as a harem drama fiction is really too… Ah forget it!
But what the hell is a soul reanimation potion?
How come there is fantasy too??
What??
Although the Princess of the Northern Kingdom is the moonlight brightening the Male Lead’s heart, and she’s the reader’s number one and only goddess, there’s no denying that she’s the Female Lead.
But! She is dead! She was killed by the author!
How many years has it been since she passed away!
She’s not a cold corpse anymore! She’s a rotten body!
To hell with the soul reanimation potion!!
Still, you self-centered prick!!
Author, doesn’t your conscience hurt?!!
Does! It! Not! Hurt?!
And! Even when the Male Lead is described to have many lovers, why did you have to write a paragraph about him looking like he was in true love with her??? It’s so confusing!!]
After seeing this comment, Xiao YuAn thought about it for a while, and then replied giving his own opinion.
[The Male Lead should’ve been in love with the Princess of the Northern Kingdom. But the Princess not only committed suicide because of him, she also didn’t accept him until her death, which is why the Male Lead became like that later, right? If the Princess of the Northern Kingdom showed a hint of love for him, I think the Male Lead will only love her for the rest of his life.]
Footnotes
- 种马小说 zhǒng mǎxiǎo shuō; A term used to describe novels with protagonists that have a special charm effect that attracts almost every women they met. Most of these kind of novels tend to be harem.